My beloved grandmother, to whom I was extremely close, passed away in late July. There’s not a day goes by that I don’t think about “Mama.” I miss our daily phone calls. I miss her pretty smile. And, I miss her Southern cooking, especially her cabbage rolls (see recipe link below!)
And, I’m not alone. Many of us have loved ones who have transitioned. During the holidays, our hearts are often tested when empty chairs (or doggie beds) seem to bring the absences closer to us. “Christmas isn’t going to be the same this year with my husband gone,” one of my intuitive consultation clients recently told me. True, it’s not the same; but since my spiritual awakening a few years ago (more details about that in later blog posts), I now understand that the end of one’s physical being doesn’t mean the end of our relationship with that person. Through prayer, meditation and memories, we can still stay connected spiritually with those who have passed. Since I discovered my intuitive gift a few years ago, I’ve opened myself up to learning more about our spiritual souls. I’ve read dozens of books by noted experts on the subject and have attended events where famous mediums like James Van Praagh and John Edward have relayed messages from the deceased to the living. And, yes, I have received my own share of messages from the spiritual world for clients and myself (although, I wouldn’t say it’s exactly like what happens to Whoopi Goldberg’s character in “Ghost.”)
The client whose husband had passed away went on to say, “I’m not going to put up a tree this year because that was my husband’s favorite thing to do.” I shared with her that while it’s good to mourn the loss, it’s also healthy to honor his memory by doing something for which he was passionate – decorating the tree! The deceased don’t want us to stop living just because they are gone. It’s the exact opposite: they want us to continue to get the most out of life. That’s one reason why the deceased will often try to make connections with us through a number of ways – moving objects, entering our dreams, creating their personal odors (like faint cigarette smoke or a particular cologne) – to either convey a message or simply just to let us know that they’re still around in spirit.
As for my beautiful late grandmother, she opted to stay connected with me through her love of cooking. A few weeks ago, I was running errands in Palm Springs and made an unscheduled stop at a grocery that I seldom shop. While in the meat department, I couldn’t believe my eyes! Placed perfectly for me to see in the display case were cabbage rolls. Immediately, I bought several to take home to bake that night for dinner. Less than an hour later, my sister, Tracy, who lives in North Carolina, calls and says, “Guess what I’m having for dinner tonight? Mama’s homemade cabbage rolls!” Our mother had emailed Tracy our grandmother’s recipe that morning!
I almost dropped my cell phone. “You’re not gonna believe this, but I’m having cabbage rolls tonight too,” and proceeded to tell her my story. Not only did Mama’s love connect with me, it is also reached out to my sister and mother, as we all had a direct link to her spirit (and cabbage rolls) that day. And since then, I have received other signs and messages from Mama. Yes, I miss her, but I smile and sometimes cry in the happiest of ways knowing that her presence is still with me. And, it will be more than ever when I spend Christmas this year in Alabama.
Now, while your loved one may reach out to you in a special manner other than cabbage rolls, I still thought I’d share Mama’s famous recipe below…I know this would make her very happy!
Love and light,
Tony
www.tony-morris.com
I’m totally trying the cabbage roll recipe. Thanks for the insightful post. And thanks for sharing the recipe.
Love it! My grandmother is smiling big knowing that you’re gonna try it out! Merry Merry to You!
There are no coincidences. Just yesterday the annual tradition of pulling out my dear grandma’s 1890 Sidney Nebraska Methodist Church Ladies Cookbook was fulfilled. Of course, the sugar cookies will fill the house with the same aroma that is so dear to me–same as I when would pull open the storm and back doors on a 0 minus day–and be pulled in both by her loving arms and warm sugar cookies. And, as always I will find a few other old timey classics–perhaps her oyster roll–to prepare not so much to eat, as to memorialize the unconditional love and affection that never dies. Our essential natures are like holograms. They carry a kind of coding, some conscious, much more unconscious, that can be used to sustain the mystery of life–the enduring power of lovingkindness across time and space. If only we allow ourselves to be present to it.
“memorialize the unconditional love and affection that never dies”…beautiful! Now, about that oyster roll….mmmmm : )
Thanks Tony for sharing your story and the recipe! I am not surprised that the young boy I once knew is as kind and loving as he was back when. You are a inspiration to me! Merry Christmas Tony! You will always hold a special place in my heart!
Honey, I love it how we can all inspire each other…not just during the holidays, but each and every day. Love to you!!
Tony, what a beautiful and inspiring story as you know my Daddy made his transition on Monday. I too will miss my daily phone calls and trips to Carrollton to visit. When Mom passed in 2004, she made many visits to Dad over the years and he delighted in being able to see her energy. I told him he was blessed that they had that connection with each other and she chose to visit him. In the last few months before Dad passed, he said she did not visit as often and he missed that.
I know in my heart that Mom was there when he transitioned over on Monday and know their energy collided into fireworks.
Mom does visit me at times in my dreams and with certain fragrances – it puts a smile on my face as I know that her energy is near. I hope that Daddy will do the same, once he is able to take his eyes off Mom.
I love you Tony and hope we can connect soon. I’ll be in touch.
Vicki – what a beautiful story about your parents. And, you are soooo right, their energies have rejoined, which means more angels during this special time of year. Love love love to you!
Tony, I lost my sister Leta in 1997, but she still comes and visits me from time to time, and just when I need her the most.
When we were young we shared a room and after a night out having fun (she was the one having fun I was a stick in the mud) she would always come in and sit in my bed and tell me her tale,,, well at times I still feel her sitting on my bed, I can really feel the bed shift from her sitting on it. So now I tell her my day and how crazy my life is at times, and she just listens until I am done and as I go off to sleep I feel her slip off the bed and go, I am not sad ever because I know that she will come back for another visit just to talk…
Carolyn, what a special relationship you will always have with your sister. I know what you mean about “still feel her sitting on my bed, I can really feel the bed shift from her sitting on it.” Energy that is graced with love, I feel, is the strongest. And, that’s exactly what is happening around you. Love to you and yours during this special time of year : )
Hey Tony, my grandmother wanted me to print out the recipe for her because she couldn’t figure out how. She said she is gonna make it as soon as she can get the ingredients. She says thank you for her sisters recipe. She’s excited about it. I can’t wait to try it and see how it turns out.
Dana – I am soooo happy that Aunt Ruby Jean saw this post. And, thank you for getting the recipe to her. Love to all.
Great post Mr. Morris – Not only do the cabbage rolls sound amazing, I can totally relate to missing someone like you “Mama”. I think of my grandmother daily and smile, especially when her wind chimes dance in the air on the carport. : )
Love the wind chimes reference…she speaks to you in the sweetest of sounds : )
now i want cabbage rolls. i miss mama. still full of spunk up to the last day and even now in spirit she still plays an active role.
Love to mama and tony.
Cole
Cole – I’m sure your mother can whip you up a batch…she has the recipe : ) Have a special holiday season!
Awesome story! My brother sent me a recipe yesterday for cabbage rolls. I wonder….. 🙂 Anyway, my Mom passed away this past October and its been a difficult time getting in the Christmas spirit and decorating and such. This particular blog is very inspiring. I have been feeling so sad because Mom didn’t leave anything, like a letter or message. She’s just gone. It made me decide to write something to my kids each year, like a friends Mom used to do for her and her sister’s. Just to say some of the things most people don’t ever tell each other until a crisis occurs.
And I will take your advise and think of some of Mom’s favorite Christmas things try to keep them a part of our celebration. Thanks Tony!
Linda – First of all, your mother is alllll around you in spirit and will be oh so happy that you included some of her favorite things in the holiday celebrations. I wouldn’t be surprised if she “shows” up in pictures this season (orbs in photos….which I’m going to blog about later this week). I’ve got dozens of pictures when spiritual presences will “be in the picture.” When loved ones don’t get (for whatever reason) to do an “official” goodbye (letter, message), then often times their spiritual presence will linger because saying goodbye (at least from the physical world) in some form or fashion could be a part of their “unfinished business.” Continue to be open for messages from your mother’s spiritual presence…Now, let me know how you like the cabbage rolls. I am soooo craving them now! Love and light to you during this holiday season.